September-First Week

So Monday was Labor Day and we didn’t have school or work. We had planned on having Callan and Karey over for lunch, but Macy work up with a sore throat so we cancelled. I tried to take Macy to the doctor, but they were closed too. I still had some antibiotics from the last time she had strep, so I gave it to her again. I do not remember much else that we did, Sam and Teddy still had football practice and so they were gone in the evening. We had grilled up burgers for lunch, and I didn’t have a dinner plan, so I made some soup for the boys and they liked it, so that was good.

I also played pickleball on Monday afternoon with some people from church and it was just what I needed. I wish I could play everyday, but its getting harder to work around everyone’s schedules. I really want to keep trying to find time because it helps me a lot.  

Tuesday was the first day that our kindergarten kids were at school the whole day. They were a little crazy. I had lunch duty for the first time with them and it was like herding cats. When the bell rang, they did not want to go in. I was yelling rather loudly that the bell had run and we needed to go to the doors. They all went to the wrong doors even though they had just had a training with their teachers where they were suppose to go, needless to say, it was kind of hard and the other duty ladies from the big playground all came over to help me. But we made it. I have a 10 minute break between kindergarten and first grade and its been nice outside to I just wait out there. It is going to be brutal in the winter when I come inside to get warm and then have to go back out again. Blah.

Anyway, I left work a little early to head to me therapy appointment. It was an interesting day. I really decided to go to counseling to help me with my eating disorder thoughts and some anxiety and depression symptoms. The intake sessions went okay and even two weeks ago were good, but today was interesting. She is wanting me to meet with a dietitian for the ED stuff and she wans to help me with some deep seeded fears and things I have buried inside. We worked on breathing and what to do when I have negative thoughts, which is all the time. She gave me a chapter in a book to read on unmet needs and how we need to work through some things. I left feeling a little defeated but its okay.

Wednesday work was okay and I left a little early to play pickleball; it was nice again but we had our normally three players, and I normally ask my friend from Idaho Falls to play but she had to work. So we had a new player that had never played before; she did okay, but it wasn’t as fast paced as usual. I still got my heart rate up and had a good time. Wednesday evening, the girls had their first singing and dance class, and they now go at the same time. It is so nice to only have to drive one time out to the lady’s house. They seemed to have a nice time. I hope they can keep being nice to each other and it will work out. This is Macy’s last year!

Thursday Macy had a field trip to Mesa Falls in Island Park. She was excited to ride a bus with her friends. Her two best friends go put in a different group than her, so she was a little sad and she said the bus ride was super long, but I think overall she had a good time. I have never had a kid have a field trip the second week of school, so that was cool!

Thursday at work they called me into the office; I never like when they do that. They told me that I needed to take an hour of my day and go to a third grade class to help out. I told them that I was already stretched in doing my first grade duties and also my outside time. The secretary then told me that I could have 19 hours instead of 16; to be honest I had a hard enough time doing 16 but I know that I need to do the 19. My first grade teacher was not too happy because they wanting me to do third grade in the morning. I think I am going to have to work out a schedule to do one day early for first and one day early for third. Well see what happens.

Thursday afternoon they posted on our ward page that their was a relief society party that evening. I had missed the announcement earlier, so I didn’t know if I was going to go or not. I really didn’t want to but I like to be supportive and we were asked to bring a side or dessert to share. I didn’t have anything to bring and told myself I didn’t want to go to the store either, but I made a last minute decision to go. They girls were at their activity and I hurried to the store and decided on some pumpkin chocolate chip bread. I brought it home and cut it up and put in on a tray to make it appear like I hadn’t just bought it.

It turned out to be a nice little gathering, I was glad that I went because there were not that many people there. I know the ladies put a lot of effort into it. I remember the one time I was the activity person in my ward when I lived in Provo with my sister and it was horrible. My sister had had the calling before me and I watched her put so many hours into it and not many people came. I even cried when the gentleman called me to the position. I wasn’t very good and was glad when it was over. So anyway, they had some chicken and sides with a few desserts and then we all sat around and talked and some people shared some ancestor experiences.  

I was supposed to have Friday’s off, but now I am going to go in to meet my hours. So we shall see. Next week I am really planning on going to the gym in the mornings, I just must suck it up and do it. I have a cousin that is in town dropping off her daughter at BYU-Idaho and she texted and asked if we wanted to meet up sometime. I told her we could come to Rexburg or they were more than welcome to come to Rigby. So, when I got home, I started cleaning because I wasn’t sure if they were going to come to our house. It didn’t end up working out to meet, so we decided to try for Saturday.

I was glad for the kick in the pants to work on getting my living room and kitchen clean. As well as the girls room. Their laundry was overflowing and I think half the stuff in there was clean. But I did two loads of their clothes and got them put away. I got the kitchen floor cleaned up and the living room okay. I still have a lot of work to do. My mom is going to be here in two weeks and I have to have it looking better. I wish we had a little bit more room in our house for some stuff, but we have a lot more than some people and I must look at the good.

Saturday morning we got up and had some football games. Well first Sally had pictures and then their games were an hour later. All three kids were playing at the same time today. I sat in proximity to all three, I could see the score board for Teddy’s game on the high school field and then I went back and forth between the girls. I kept going over to Macy’s when she wasn’t in, but a mom got her on video getting an interception and a touchdown. I was proud of her. Sally also played more this week and didn’t cry. I was able to make it to the last quarter of Teddy’s game; they won 48-6 and Teddy scored three times, maybe 4.

After the games, we came home and Teddy and I went to the fields by our house to watch another football game. Then the girls and I went up to Rexburg to meet up with my cousin. We met at sodavine; my girls got a pretzel and a drink and I got a lemonade. I was nice to catch up. We then called my sister who has been staying at my brothers house. She was home alone with the baby, so we stopped by for a little bit.

We didn’t do much after we got home. Teddy stayed at a friends house until 9:30 at night, he wanted to stay longer but I was ready to stay home and did not want to go later to get him. I took a bath and went to bed.

Sunday night I got up to go to the bathroom 4 times, it was not pleasant. This whole week I have felt a little off. So waking up Sunday morning was hard. I contemplated just keep sleeping but we got up anyway and one of the teachers in my class texted that she wasn’t feeling good either, so I am glad I sucked it up and went. Church was okay

When we got home, I laid down for a couple of hours; I don’t know if I ever went really out with the kids come in and out, but I tried. I was being super lazy but I wasn’t really feeling great. My husband had his computer most of the afternoon, so I didn’t post Sunday.

Its now Monday and Sunday night was even worse than Saturday night. I went to bed by 9:30 but I didn’t necessarily fall asleep. At 12:00 I started to get a tummy ach and it worked its way from my stomach to my throat and at 12:30, I ran to the bathroom and threw up. It was unpleasant and made me feel so yucky. Its crazy to think that with my eating disorder, I have thrown up my whole life and its never been too bad. I can count on one hand the times I have gotten sick and thrown up. I don’t know, it just was horrible. So I went back to lie down and I just laid there for hours. Then would have to get up to go to the bathroom and it just went on all night.

When morning came, I was not a happy person. I got my girls out the door and went back to bed. I really wanted to start going to the gym but I couldn’t do it. I tried to sleep for another hour and wish I could have called in sick for work, but I went in. I am having to spend an hour a day in a third grade class each day and its not my favorite, and my first grade teacher is not too happy, I do what they ask me to do. It worked out okay but I felt miserable all day. I got a really bad headache as I was outside watching the kids for recess and it only grew. By the time I left, my head hurt so bad and my nose was starting to run and was all stuffy.

When I got home I took some ibuprofen and wanted to lay down but I knew I needed to do some work for my dad. So I was able to get in the calls that I needed to make and then was going to lie down but then my husband called and asked if I could bring something to him, I totally didn’t want to but I did. He told me that I didn’t have to pick up Teddy from school today, so that was nice.

At 3;30, Sally had her first dance class of the season. She was nervous but we talked about being brave and finding our courage and not crying. She has a new outfit and tights, and I didn’t tell her but she is using Macy’s shoes. We got there a little early and filled out a waiver and she got all ready and gave me too many hugs but I left. Last time she tried dance, it just didn’t work out. She cried and wouldn’t let me leave and so I was proud of her for keeping her cool. I went home and laid down for the hour she was gone and then went to grab her. She told me she almost cried a few times but she didn’t. I let her get a treat from the gas station on the way home. I hope that she keeps it up.

So anyway, I now have to cook dinner and I really don’t want to. My head still hurts, and my sinus pressure is so strong. I took some medicine and will take some more before I go to bed. Wish me luck!!!